Keep running to the light

I once heard someone say that women are the only ones who snort when they laugh. That you never hear men snort when they laugh.

I was curious after that, and I began my observation of the laugh snort. And since that day years ago, I’ve never heard a man snort when he laughed.

Plenty of my female friends have laugh snorted, especially when we’re in fun-filled group settings. Why is this?

I think it’s because women have been taught in so many cultures not to impose themselves. A loud laugh might be considered not dainty enough. 

So, women try to hold the loudness of the laugh in, and then the laugh turns into a snort.

I’ve lived in cultures where women are considered to be free, and where women are considered to be suppressed.

I got in trouble for loud laugh outbursts in school growing up (I wasn’t talking – just reacting!), in the outskirts of Washington, D.C. And I got daggers for looks in Saudi Arabia, laughing in malls with my American, British, and Canadian girlfriends.

The next time you watch a stand-up comedian show, check out how many women cover their mouths when they laugh. Once you start to see it, you see it everywhere.

Women hold themselves back from fully expressing themselves. And that saddens me.

In this most recent U.S. Open, the tennis commentator Patrick McEnroe told a story of when Serena Williams first started dating her husband, Alexis Ohanian. Alexis told Serena “Keep on running to the light – and be Serena.”

Serena Williams has had plenty of critics, and I thought it was so touching that he understood and accepted her and told her to not deter from moving towards the light – her light.

Her being. Her clarity. Your being. Your clarity. Your expression. Your joy.

We live a life of covered mouths and laugh snorts. Literally and figuratively. I see our freedom of expression being censored every day.

When you’re an outlier, someone else who wants to be one can find comfort that they’re not alone. And to the next person and to the next.

That sounds like a beautiful place to live to me – a world of uncovered expression and laughs in full voice.